how to get unstuck

photo by Liz Brown

We haven’t hosted a popup dinner in over a year. We organized a few last year, but didn’t sell enough tickets to any of them. The dinners are now on an indefinite hiatus.

Those gatherings were my way of contributing to the city. It made my life feel purposeful. It’s difficult to no longer have a place to channel my creative energy. I always need some sort of project to work on, otherwise I have an overabundance of energy with no place to put it. That’s my current problem.

It’s not the dinners losing steam that bothers me as much as it’s that I have all of these ideas and passions without a proper place to put them. I’ve never climbed a mountain, but I assume this is what they mean when they talk about “plateaus”. I was climbing for so long and now it’s just a lot of walking. I’m not made for walking, I was made for that climb.

In all we hosted seven dinners. I learned a lot from them and think back to each of those nights often, but I need to be looking ahead more. I look back too much and need to turn my gaze forward. What’s next? What do I do? Where can all of this energy go now?

I need to find an answer soon because this energy is beginning to change into restlessness and that’s never good. I want to feel like I’m giving of myself again, I want to feel like I’m contributing in a meaningful, purposeful way.